I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
