how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
