I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
