when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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