im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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