I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i just sent this text using only my big toe
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize