The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
