I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
