you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
