Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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