THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
