I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
