oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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