My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
