She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
