My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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