College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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