I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
