forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
