fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
