Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
