part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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