I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize