we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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