I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
