it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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