I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
