This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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