My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Two words: nipple clamps
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