Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
