do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
