I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
