just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
There's always time for handjobs
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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