Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Im part way to drunk.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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