Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college

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  (508): I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college http://tfl.nu/po1d
  Replies (3) Good night (635) Bad night (721)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram

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  (267): worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram http://tfl.nu/sbpo
  Replies (11) Good night (548) Bad night (2539)
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  (925): View more from California

  He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."

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  (925): He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods." http://tfl.nu/7kxl
  Replies (17) Good night (810) Bad night (2922)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.

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  (651): I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning. http://tfl.nu/un48
  Replies (23) Good night (3269) Bad night (516)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  can you come get me at the bar

  (301): View more from Maryland

  ill be there in 10 min

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  can we stop off at build a bear on the way home

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  (570): can you come get me at the bar (301): ill be there in 10 min (570): can we stop off at build a bear on the way home http://tfl.nu/der9
  Replies (37) Good night (9594) Bad night (749)
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  (516): View more from New York

  just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination

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  (516): just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination http://tfl.nu/dj79
  Replies (30) Good night (4437) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here

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  (515): Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here http://tfl.nu/owjx
  Replies (12) Good night (4500) Bad night (503)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse

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  (785): so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse http://tfl.nu/82q3
  Replies (10) Good night (601) Bad night (4104)
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  (716): View more from New York

  i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly

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  (716): i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly http://tfl.nu/a8cm
  Replies (19) Good night (1356) Bad night (5463)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...

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  (781): I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing... http://tfl.nu/jqiv
  Replies (6) Good night (2482) Bad night (1089)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...

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  (403): Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees... http://tfl.nu/cx6b
  Replies (7) Good night (2013) Bad night (568)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.

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  (719): Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs. http://tfl.nu/ixry
  Replies (3) Good night (1478) Bad night (408)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.

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  (651): Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown. http://tfl.nu/eqha
  Replies (1) Good night (867) Bad night (307)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.

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  (501): I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho. http://tfl.nu/d92o
  Replies (16) Good night (1347) Bad night (532)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.

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  (860): Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves. http://tfl.nu/jaio
  Replies (1) Good night (512) Bad night (289)

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