Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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