It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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