who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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