I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
dude i'm inner monologue high
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Randomize