put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
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