Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
