I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
