I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Randomize