Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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