I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
