her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
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