Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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