So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
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