ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
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Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
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the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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