my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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