I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
