I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize