a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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